Sunday, October 17, 2010

..the rescue

I was lost alone in the darkness,
Shadows lurking all around,
Shuddering in the cold of the night,
Just praying i'd be found

It was then that morning broke,
And upon me a new day dawned
There was a little spark of hope
Lord for you my spirit longed


Fed up of being tossed around...
Down that road and across that river..
Lord Jesus please hear my cry
Lead me i pray, to You , Father..

It was You who heard my cry,
It was You who took my hand,
It was You who led me home,
Down into Your promised land..

You're the one who heard my call,
You're the One who set me free,
You're the one who took my hand.
You're the One who rescued me :)

...lydia

Friday, October 8, 2010

the faith life

2 Corinthians 4:18 While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.

To live a victorious life, there are things you ought to give full consideration. Faith is not the denial of facts. Faith is acting on God’s Word in spite of contrary circumstances. For instance you may be feeling sick in your body. It is not faith when you say “I am not sick, I am only weak” like some people say, trying to deny the feelings in their body. It is faith when you declare God’s Word which says “By His stripes I was healed!” you refuse to consider or give attention to the pain rather you fix your eyes on Jesus who is the author and perfecter of our faith. Like I said faith is not a denial of facts, it is the refusal to consider those facts and rather consider that which is eternal and unchanging—the Word.

The circumstances of your life may not measure up to God’s Word you have believed and have been confessing. Don’t get worried at all. Do not stagger at the promise of God through unbelief; be strong in faith by giving glory to God! And like Abraham you would obtain the promise. The circumstances of your life are temporary i.e. they are subject to change! Like someone said, “no condition is permanent”.
The Word of God abides forever and that is the true source of Faith for the believer.
Believe and confess God’s Word in spite of contrary winds and you would be sure glad you did.

Isaiah 40:8 The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall stand for ever.

...eugene

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

the beauty within

I was walking…..
Then I lifted my eyes…..
In the distance……
I saw a beautiful and unique creature
I stood amazed
Who carved this creature
He must have been a good sculpture
Then I remembered
He is the Creator and greatest Sculpture

So I drew closer…..
Ah, such confidence in that look
Such beauty inside and outside;
Uniqueness exuded from this creature
Glory and excellence was not missing either
This Creator must be proud of His handiwork

I said to myself…..
Does she know about it?
Oh! That he would refuse to look down on himself or think he amounts to nothing
Potential is what I see!
Power is what is manifested!
This poem is about YOU!
It’s to tell you that….. You carry so much potential
To tell you that…..You are not like any other person
You have a unique and different testimony. Never belittle yourself

It’s to tell you that…..Your life is a testimony to many
Your very smile makes the saddened heart joyful
Your warm hug melts away every fear and confusion
That pat on the back encourages and motivates
Your quiet presence is all that person needs
Your very words are like a penetrating sword, which sinks into the depths of the soul and spirit
Like a mighty dynamo they carry power and bring about tremendous effect

Love, YOU have all that it takes to change a life
GOD created you for a reason and a purpose
He made you the way you are to fulfill that particular purpose
You are not an accident!
Neither were you brought into the world by chance
The Creator fashioned and intricately made YOU
Believe it or not, He is crazy about YOU
So in love words cannot express
He’s so overjoyed and excited to see you accomplish His purpose for you


Beloved, YOU are the apple of His eye…..
The one He desires to be with….
YOU, yes YOU

Don’t let Him down….Stand up…..Stand tall…..Remember you have potential…..
And make your Creator and Father proud
THE WORLD IS BLESSED TO HAVE YOU


caroline

Friday, September 10, 2010

Locate yourself in God’s purpose

And say to Archippus, take heed to the ministry which thou hast received in the Lord, that thou fulfill it (Colossians 4:17)
As a child of God, it is important that you locate yourself in God’s purpose for your life and function in it. Functioning in God’s purpose for you will make your life count both in quality and in the impact you make in your world.
There are three basic ways you can find and keep yourself in God’s purpose for you. First it is by praying often in the spirit. Praying in the spirit helps to position you in line with God’s thinking and activate your spirit to receive His thoughts. When your spirit is activated, he’s then able to receive God’s signals, counsel and guidance. Then you find that your actions are in sync with God’s purpose and plan for your life.

Something else you have to do to locate yourself and function in God’s purpose is to focus on those things God has called you to do. If you keep your focus and refuse to be distracted, you’ll be walking in God’s purpose from one level of glory to another. Don’t push to the future the things God has asked you to do now; focus on them and do them NOW, for your future begins now! So now is the time to do the things God has asked you to do.

The third thing to do in locating yourself in God’s purpose is to meditate on God’s Word; assimilate His thoughts into your spirit. That way, your spirit will be conditioned to act in line with the will of God. If you do these things, the necessary result is that the Spirit of God will guide you into the perfect will of God for your life, such that you’ll never have to wonder whether or not you’re doing the right thing; you’ll know.


Prayer
Dear Father, thank you for granting me the length of days, and for helping me fulfill my destiny and calling in Christ. I’m running my race swiftly, pressing toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus, under the inspiration of your Spirit, and guidance of your Word, in Jesus’ name. Amen.
I got this from the devotional Rhapsody of Realities (Saturday, 26th June, 2010)



....eugene

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Nothing is Impossible with GOD!

Jeremiah 32:17
17: "‘Ah, Lord God! Behold, You have made the heavens and the earth by Your great power and outstretched arm. There is nothing too hard for You".

Our minds tend to see our problems as big or small. Even when we pray for the sick, we say things like, “You have a headache? No problem. Let’s pray for your healing.” But when it is cancer, we say, “Oh, let’s tell a senior pastor or a bishop about it. It would be better if he prayed for you.” We think of headaches as small problems and cancers as big ones.

But that is not the way God thinks. There is nothing too hard for Him who made the heavens and the earth! With God, there is no such thing as a “big” problem. In fact, the “bigger” the problem, the “easier” it is for Him! In the feeding of the 5,000, it took only five loaves to feed the multitude. (Matthew 14:15–21) But in the feeding of the smaller multitude of 4,000, it took seven loaves. (Matthew 15:32–38)

In man’s scheme of things, it should take more loaves to feed more people. But this is not so with God. It took fewer loaves to feed more people. This is God’s way of telling us that the “bigger” the problem, the “easier” it is for Him. I am not saying that small problems are hard for God. But it is so encouraging to think that it is “easier” for God to heal cancers than headaches!

Imagine coming to God with a big problem. “So, what is your problem, dear?” God asks. You say, “Father, it is a huge financial debt — not thousands but millions!” He says, “Easy. It is already canceled.”

In another scenario, God asks, “So, what is your problem, dear?” You say, “Father, I have lost my job and I can’t find a new one. I am already in my fifties and I don’t have the necessary qualifications.” He says, “No problem. Consider yourself employed. And in this new job, you won’t just have a job, you will have a position."

....danny

Monday, August 23, 2010

U are blessed....not condemned!

2 Corinthians 5:19
19… God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them…


On which two ancient cities did God rain brimstone and fire? If your answer is Sodom and Gomorrah, you are right. But if you think that God was all eager to destroy the two cities, you are wrong!

God wasn’t willing at all. He was not on a sin hunt. He was on a righteousness hunt so that He could spare the cities. (Genesis 18:23–32) And I believe that if Abraham had asked God, “What if You can find just one righteous man?” God’s answer would have been the same: “I will not destroy the place for the sake of one righteous man.”

Today, the righteousness of one Man — Jesus — has come. Jesus died for our sins and rose again for our justification. God was in Christ, reconciling the world to Himself, not counting our sins against us!

Therefore, no judgment will fall on you today because it fell on Jesus 2,000 years ago at Calvary. And if God was gracious enough to remove Lot and his family before the judgment fell (Genesis 19:12–22), how much more will He do for you who are no longer under judgment!

And because God does not judge you, don’t be like Lot’s wife, who became a pillar of salt when she turned around to look at the brimstone and fire. (Genesis 19:24–26) She wanted to see God’s judgment, even though the angels had warned, “Don’t look back, lest you be destroyed.” (Genesis 19:17)

So don’t be judgment-focused, don't look back at the sins you have committed because God is not against you. He is for you and on your side. He remembers that He has already judged and punished your sins in the body of His Son. And because He is faithful to His Son and to what His Son has done, He will never judge or punish you. Any trouble that you might have today is not from Him. But He will show you a way of escape because He is on your side. He loves you and has your best interests at heart.

God is not out to get you. He is out to bless you. And He wants you blessed more than you can ever ask or imagine! (Ephesians 3:20)

....danny


Wednesday, August 18, 2010

You Are Special..

In life,you come to a point where you need someone you can completely trust and count on.I don't know about you but i have been there before.Everyone gets to that threshold at one point or another.To throw in the towel during these times would mean letting go of your dreams and aspirations.To gather courage and move on would mean walking into the ferocious gauntlet of life.To remain stationary would attract heart-breaking comments and accusations from people around you. Like a criminal in ancient Rome being prepared for the guillotine, you feel like life is about to end.

Well, guess what, you are not the first nor are you going to be the last to face the enormous,inexhaustible vicissitudes of life.Do you know why you were made in His likeness? Have you considered why you were custom-made? Do you even know why people criticize and mock you? You see, just as it's only the manufacturer of an invention who can adequately understand and sufficiently operate his contraption so can no man determine what your future is going to be like.It is only the God who made you who can LOVE YOU unconditionally,eternally.

Because of your unique nature,not many people can comprehend or assuage that innate,innermost craving you've always had-you need to consult the ONE who made you! You see,no matter what you've done or where you've been JESUS can put the pieces together in your life and give you what you've always been looking for-an ETERNAL PURPOSE.
JESUS LOVES YOU(JLY).


....prince

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

IMPERFECTLY PERFECT...


…And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I’m never going to be good enough for you…
Now it’s just too late
And we can’t go back
I’m sorry I can’t be perfect…


......Simple plan


I don’t know how many of us have heard this song by Simple Plan. When I first heard it, I thought ‘this song describes my life and puts into words exactly what I have yearned to say.

One too many times, we tend to do things intended to make our loved ones proud of us but we never really meet their standards. Instead of a warm smile, a pat on the back or a word to show the pride they have in us, we most often get silence, a blank expression and sometimes a reprimand. I don’t know how many of us have been there before but I have travelled that road more times than I can remember. Simply put- the message is- ‘you will never be good enough.’

It’s about time we realized we can’t keep living through the eyes of others. I remember, some time back, when I hurt a close friend deeply. For months I kept apologizing. The only genuine response I ever got was ‘I’m disappointed in you’. The fact is that what I did was in the past and I couldn’t go back and change things. One day I told him ‘I’m sorry I can’t be the perfect person you wished I was. I can’t keep living like this because I have to pick myself up and move on.’

Many times in relationships, we find ourselves comparing or being compared to ex-partners, if there is such a case. You find that you never really match up. You keep falling short somewhere. Truth be told, you will never match up to that ex-partner so stop trying. Get up, love your imperfect self and move on and if your partner does not see you as good enough, well he or she is going to be the worse for it.

So how do we move on? This might come as a surprise but we can only do that on our knees. One songwriter puts it this way “I’ve learned in laughter or in pain how to survive; I get on my knees.There, I am before the love that changes me. I don’t know how but there’s power when I get on my knees.” Exactly so!

On your knees, your imperfections are made perfect by the Perfect Creator who made you as you are and loves you as you are. He does not require you to upgrade yourself before coming to Him. Actually; He takes your supposed defects and makes it the unique thing about you. So if there are people out there who still see you as imperfect, look them in the eye and tell them, ‘I’m sorry but I couldn’t be more perfect. And say it with no apologies!

......Wumbornyi.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

If Only….

The TWISTED ROPE complains of discomfort
The COOLED METAL from the furnace wonders if it will enjoy malleability ever again
The RICH MAN who lives in a mansion is dissatisfied with his servants’ work
The STREET CHILD wonders what he did to deserve his pauperdom

The BARREN LAND, in cogitation, wonders if she’s of any use to her master
And SILENCE scavenges all day long in hope of finding the perfect ambience for merry-making
The MODERN DAY wishes his generation would to slow down a bit to savour the wonders of creation
And the OBEDIENT CHILD is beginning to have second thoughts because his world purports that, ”it sacks to be perfect”

The NIGHT is bitter because the sun refuses to grace her with his presence
And the SUN in turn doesn’t understand why the moon is so dependent on him
If only TIME would permit them to have a meaningful discourse to sought out their age-long quarrel
The HEART yearns for that glorious day when he would go on vacation without taking another life

I can go on and on and on and on…….and eons of time would not permit me to exhaust the list

I GUESS YOU’VE BEEN THINKING,
IF ONLY………,THEN MY LIFE WOULD BE……….
GUESS WHAT! YOUR THOUGHTS WISH FOR THE DAY HER MASTER WOULD LEARN TO APPRECIATE HOW BEAUTIFUL, MAGNIFICENT AND UNIQUE GOD HAS MADE HIM!
EVEN YOUR THOUGHTS ENVY YOU!!!

JESUS LOVES YOU (JLY)

BY prince

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

NOT UNDER BUSHEL

In innocent blemish,
Was I conceived and born,
To run a race of three-score and ten,
In a dingy and unwholesome world as this,
Where purity has lost its place,
And vanity's scepter, held up high.

With no guidance or discipline to uphold,
Soon my innocence was ruptured,
And corrupted, my blemish magnified;
As the subtle seduction so served,
Was irresistible to my wanting self,
In a world where perverts had the play.

Of boozing, I had my qualifications;
The shameless whore, my bed befriended;
I dined and wined on the gambling table;
And the deadly pistol, my only true friend.
Reverence I thought I received,
When all men shuddered at my behest.

Alas, my soul grumbled from within.
I made way to meet up with my inner man:
So entrapped, so emasculated, he was within.
There was truly no peace within,
And joy could only be part of my day dream.

My soul yearned for completeness,
Joy and peace unspoken,
A life beyond this world, yes eternal!
Then I met my saviour and the light to my path.
Now I'm saved and have it bright:
The wholesome light that cast out darkness.

Shall I hide it under bushel or let it shine?
Nay! Upon a torch I shall have it lit,
And send it in to those I left behind,
Not dreading their scorn or sour reproach.
I shall be the light to them that grope in darkness.
Not under bushel, but on a candlestick up high!

(my inspiration:Matthew 5:14)

.....Priscenyo

Friday, July 23, 2010

HEAVEN SENT (..the poem)

I walked on, on a deserted road
I looked radiant but inside, my world crumbled
Then came someone, or was it an angel?
Well he couldn’t keep my world from crumbling
But he caught my falling star.

Tears of dejection run down my cheeks
Sadness from disappointment filled my eyes
Then came someone, or was it an angel?
Well he couldn’t stop the tears
But he made me smile through them.

Today, I see through the eyes of gratitude
And light shines through my broken world
Father realized I needed someone; a friend
So He sent one
But it wasn’t someone that came to me
It was an angel…


.....Wumbornyi

HEAVEN SENT (..the story)

A few years back when I was in senior high school, I went for a club meeting. What we had scheduled for that day was what the executives called ‘angel -and -mortal’ and that was what we were to try out for the rest of the term. It worked like this; we all wrote down our names on pieces of papers and put them together in a basket. Now everyone was to pick a piece of paper from the basket and the person whose name you found written on that paper became your mortal and you, her angel. Now, angels were to watch over their mortals and pray for them everyday and mortals were to receive notes from their angels encouraging them and the notes were signed ‘from your angel’. This goes to say that mortals didn’t know who their angels were. At the end of the term, we got together and found out who our angels were.Personally, I thought it was a splendid idea! I didn’t know my mortal very well; she was my senior but I prayed so hard for her that by the time I was done I realized I was as concerned about her as I was about myself. Everyone was someone’s angel and everyone was someone’s mortal so you prayed and were prayed for.

Pretty much the same thing goes on in our everyday lives. Have you ever gone through trying times and it seemed as though your problems would outweigh you and you had no one to share your burdens with? You know, God knows that sometimes after talking to him, we need our fellow humans to support us too so He sends us angels. They come as everyday people and they come in the nick of time and they let us know that they’ve got our backs, and before we know we’re standing again. Sometimes when their job is done, they leave the scene. You see, God doesn’t want us to become dependent on them (for one day the arm of flesh shall fail you). Other times, we ourselves drive them away with our attitudes. Human angels don’t always come by, so when they do, you do all you can to make them see that they are appreciated.

Tyler Perry once said that in our lives there are leaves, branches and roots. The people who are roots in our lives don’t always come along, so when they do, you do what you have to do to make sure they stay. If a branch says he wants to leave, you’d better let him leave because he was never meant to stay. You may ask how to tell the difference. Just sit down and do some stock taking of your life. There are people who simply love you for you, they never ask anything in return, they cherish your advice and company, you know you can count on them to help so long as they can and even if they don’t go on their knees, they still pray for you one way or the other. Such people don’t flatter you. If you did something wrong, they let you know in very plain language that you were wrong. I guess by now you know the people I am talking about and you also realize there are very few of them. Those people are the ‘roots’ or the human angels in your life. Most often, its people like that that end up as our life partners. You have no business marrying a ‘branch’ because he or she was never designed to stay. Get the picture?

So what now? Just do what you have to do to keep those angels around because you need them and they need you. If a passing angel has to go, simply cherish every moment and time that the person blessed your life.Immortalise them in your heart. Right now I have to go tell one special angel what a blessing he has been. You also go on and do the same!


.....Wumbornyi

GREATER LOVE

“Therefore just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the Church and gave himself for…”
This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the Church are one.
– Eph 5:25-32

For the first time I get this whole women must submit and men must love thing. It has nothing to do with any of the two species or their personality differences or genetic make-up but everything to do with Christ (God).
All of mankind is the body of Christ (at least those who belong to God) and we have been prepared as the bride of Christ and Christ is the groom. To enable us have a little peak into the love that He (Christ) has for us, God instituted the marriage union. When God wanted the prophet Hosea to understand His love for His children, He sent the prophet off to marry a prostitute. And as much as the wife prostituted herself with a whole lot of men, the prophet still loved her and was always ready to forgive her. He loved her in spite of herself. And this is how God admonished men to love their wives (in spite of themselves); not because men have no heart and so must learn to love but because men are playing the role of Christ in marriage. Women were also to submit to their husbands because, that is the role of the church, to submit to God’s authority (men plus women (included) make up the Church)

Eph 5:1 says that we should be “imitators of God as dear children…” so we must all step up to the challenge and take on our respective roles and perform them efficiently.

I was beginning to sense a bit of unfairness in this whole thing because men have to do twice what women were asked to do. Thus men are asked to submit to Christ (because men also form part of the body of Christ) and then again they are asked to love their wives; but women are only asked to submit. Want to know why? God gave me an answer; men are to do twice as much work because Christ is greater than the Church. And the greater you are the more responsibility you have especially in caring for the weaker and not so great ones. Also, men are given the unique task of loving because love is the greatest gift of all (1 Cor 13:13) and with greatness comes Great gifts.

So men really are superior (in responsibility) to women because God is superior to the Church. That is just the way God made it! It is not because men are special or superior (in essence) to women. But it is because Christ himself (God) has given them that great privilege to be his imitators. You know how we are always saying that we women do not realize how powerful we are, I believe also that men do not know who God has really made them to be and how much authority and power he has given to them. With this whole “whatever a man can do women can also do better”, men are fighting back for their position as heads of the family, the Church and even the co-operate world. But what men need to realize is that God has bestowed greatness on them already. God meant for them to be in control.

John 15:13 says that, “…greater love has no man than this, to lay down one’s life for his friends”.

For the men: if all this greatness thing is beginning to get into your head just know that the greatest form of love is submission – losing one’s self for the cause of another. Greatness is therefore in store for everyone (man or woman) who is ready to lose themselves for the cause of Christ and also for others.

For the women: So women, we can also be great when we truly learn to submit.
AMEN!


....Karen

Thursday, July 22, 2010

WAITING………….SOMETIMES, IT GETS YOU THERE FASTER AND MAKES YOU STRONGER.(the poem)

The days are too long this year
I think silently to myself.
In my mind, I see a picture of a farmer
dragging an unwilling plowing bull down the fields
The strain in its legs and the weariness in its eyes remind me a lot of myself and my days
It’s been 365 days since I sent that fervent cry up the heavens but still no reply;
I am weary on all sides.
Weary of all these emotions threatening to explode within me and crush me down.
I so desperately wish joy will come and embrace me and take me away from anxiety.
Let me be happy for just this moment, I say to myself
And so, Happiness feigns itself in me for a teeny weensy moment but soon goes rushing out the window
Just when I let my guard down for a minute, anxiety peeks through the door
Despair and Depression lag closely behind threatening to burst in.
Enough! I cry out and crumble onto the floor.
Help me Father, for I am tired!
In the mist of my tears, I hear the silence around me
Silence that is not too loud and obtrusive but that, that is quiet
“Quiet my child”, a voice whispers to me
Lie down and rest for a while. It gently says to me.
Be calm so that you may regain your strength.
Only rest for awhile and I promise I will wake you up to a brighter day in my own good time.
And for that day you will need your strength.
Only be patient my darling………
Because this wait is inevitable.

...Sena

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

The Father’s Love

Birds singing and chirping sweet melodies of the Father’s Love and Grace that encompasses all His creation.
Trees providing an abode to nest these little creatures without question.
Indeed no one knows- no one understands the nature and time of expiration of the contract between the high branches of the tree and the birds of the air.
Incomprehensible it is
Incalculable humanly
Yet conspicuous physically
Commuting all year long our little friend who defies gravity is never homeless

Cogitate deeply. Ponder carefully. And soon it is clear that their contract far exceeds just the provision of shelter.
The ever-loving tree feeds his longtime friend faithfully

A playground for mother and chicks; A runway for first time flights; And a refuge in time of danger.
All these privileges enjoyed without payment.
A mansion fully furnished. Cable present to provide a wide view of events everywhere, yet free.

Surprised? No need to be.
Wondering if the same could happen to you?
Perhaps you are saying to yourself,”what a relationship!”
Such is the life given to us by the Saviour. His is Wonderful. Others call Him Counselor.
He is the Mighty God.

Just as the relationship between the bird and the tree is incomprehensible, so is the Father’s love for you.
Do you seek rest? Do you want to be fed and never go hungry again? Or perhaps you need someone to love and comfort you.

Go no further. Strive no longer. But consider His offer.
He bled and died for you. His resurrection opened a new chapter in the history of the divine.

He did not leave you to be alone rather He sent you the Comforter.
Believe in your heart and confess with your mouth His Lordship today.
Enter into His rest and begin to walk in the supernatural by Faith.

JESUS LOVES YOU (JLY)

.......prince

WAITING………….SOMETIMES, IT GETS YOU THERE FASTER AND MAKES YOU STRONGER.(the story)

Isaiah 40:31
They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength,
They will soar as with eagle’s wings;
They will run and not grow weary,
Walk and not grow faint.


There comes a period in the life of every individual where he or she would have to wait for something to happen. It could be something as mundane as waiting your turn in a queue to purchase an item or something as extraordinary as waiting to hear news of a big promotion in one’s life. However, one thing that I have come to realize is that during all these periods of waiting, an end is always attained.

Ultimately, the big question that should be asked and wondered about is what kind of end would my period of wait attain? This question I think is the biggest weight one has to carry during any wait period. You see, it not only requires quiescence but a tremendous amount of patience and believe me, it may sometimes sap the life out of you.

Anybody who had to wait for something really important to happen in his or her life would identify with the many conflicting emotions that swirl in one’s mind and heart, threatening to explode and expose! Anxiety, I have found is a major culprit. Ever-faithful Despair is always there to support Anxiety and how will these two diseases keep up without Depression silently spreading its deadly spores?

I have had to wait for so many things to happen in my life-those times I call my defining moments. They always followed the pattern described early on but some way, somehow, the eye of God was on me and His loving and blessed hands never departed whenever I cried out in despair and frustration. His hands are always generous when you spread yours before him and patiently wait on Him.


......Sena

On the subject of depression.....

I wish for words to describe
This nameless feeling which seeks
To engulf me
This vast ocean of mixed emotions
Which threatens to drown me
In its bottomless depths
Feebly I struggle
As wave after strong wave
Of utter hopelessness overpower me
Deep in my heart resides
Emptiness, pitch black and endless
As a starless night sky
Gaping, abysmal
Sucking out the life from inside me
In my mind,
I wrestle with the unyielding arms
Of despair
That relentlessly pulls me
As I struggle for balance
On the thin thread of hope
Beneath which
The pit of depression yawns

MY STORY

As I child I would often find myself getting sad for no reason, only this sadness was not like the type you feel after you get a scolding or thrashing from your parents. This was more pronounced and seemed to come right after I finished rejoicing about something. I had extreme periods of highs and lows, and in a moment I’d go from riding multiple waves of delight to sinking to depths of gloom. After a while it didn’t surprise me anymore and I actually began to predict some of these episodes. I didn’t know what, if anything was wrong with me.

In my teenage years, it continued but this time I had actual reasons to be depressed and I recognised it for what it was. At times I would watch my friends’ faces radiant with the joy of youth and wonder to myself why I was not a bit more like them. I would wish desperately that someone; anyone would see the constant turmoil of my heart and help me. I tried to be more like everybody else, young, carefree and living in the present. But my subconscious would not let me. It seemed like the depression had become this living shadow, stalking me and silently daring me to be happy. Even when I wasn’t thinking of things of the past (or the present, or the future, it really didn’t matter) it seemed like they were always around, tormenting me and preventing me from being normal.

The depression was like an almost constant blackness beyond which was a thick wall. No matter how much I tried to reach out, I always ended up hitting against the wall. I didn’t realise it then, but I was held prisoner by my very own self. By allowing issues to weigh down on me, I was robbing myself of the peace of mind that every child of God should have.
Depression stems from several issues. Lack of self esteem, anxiety, fear, rejection, failure, anger, bitterness..........I could go on and on. It’s easy to get depressed when you go through difficulties in life. The funny thing is that you will always find something dissatisfactory with your life. Getting depressed about it actually does nothing to change the situation.
Depression can make you into a somewhat selfish human being who is always looking inward. You ignore the love all around you because you either cannot see it or don’t think you deserve it.

I’m no expert on how to combat depression, but I find that prayer helps. There’s something amazingly comforting about knowing that there’s someone to whom you can pour out your innermost fears without being judged or laughed at. I find solace in the fact that God is always with me and knows everything. Once you acknowledge his omniscience, you’ll find that it’s a bit easier because you do not have to carry your burdens.
Someone said that one way to extenuate your problems is to concentrate on those of someone else. Being a friend to those around you is good medicine for the troubled soul.

Count your blessings. We’ve heard that statement over and over again. It’s startling in its truth and simplicity. If you actually take time to appreciate what you have, as little or insignificant as it may be, you might actually find some happiness. And speaking of which, dwell on the things that make you happy. To this day, I love sitcoms and generally comedy because at least for a few hours, I get to escape into someone else’s imagination and be entertained.

Of course, all of this is easier said. But the bottom line is you have to yank yourself up and out of depression. Everything in life is a choice and you have to decide not to be depressed or you will miss out on all the beauty that life has to offer.

......................Mary